Chaotic Academia

Mayo ~ 20 ~ She/Him
Filipino-Chinese American

Shadowy Menace Sighted Skulking Campus Grounds

"I've never seen it with my own eyes," Campus Head of Security admits, "I highly doubt it exists at all!"

The creature (that's me!)

A new sighting of the elusive creature, referred to simply as "Mayo" by campus residents, is now the ninth documented appearance in what has become a series of sightings in and around the University. Witnesses describe the creature as small, two legged, and with pale white skin. According to these same witnesses, the creature has only ever been seen at night, often between the hours of 8 and 10pm, leading experts to believe that it could perhaps be deterred by light and/or and heat. Sightings of the creature have occurred most frequently near the dormitories, library, and science labs.

In response last Wednesday, campus RAs reminded students to take precautions while traveling to and fro campus at night, including traveling in pairs or small groups. Following this announcement, the creature has been occasionally seen in the company of one or two other students, leading many to believe that the creature is not the eldritch horror touted by locals, but simply a student with a particularly dysfunctional sleeping schedule.

In light of these most recent speculations, this reporter headed to the University campus in search of the truth, hopefully to identify the creature itself.

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The (Ironic) DNI List

  • Pre-meds

  • Liberals

  • Secular vegans/vegetarians

  • Minimalists

  • Think queer is a slur

  • Have a Twitter

  • Get gender envy from white twinks

  • Sleep with less than two pillows

  • Think the Myers-Briggs test is a legitimate qualifier of personality

  • Own a chihuahua

  • Like weather hotter than 80F (27C)

  • Have unironically given yourself (or still have) an eyebrow slit

  • Romanticize studying at Oxford or Cambridge University

  • Think self-deprecation is legitimately funny

  • Like the smell of gasoline

Definitely Interact

  • He/him lesbians

  • Own chickens

  • Like buying secondhand books (even if you never read them)

  • Can read and write cursive

  • Are a tradesman

  • Don't know how to or don't like driving

  • Have a complicated relationship with pronouns

  • Find it easier to express yourself in writing than verbally

  • Know how to ride a horse

  • Have Snapchat and/or Instagram but barely post anything

What is Chaotic Academia?

Chaotic Academia is (what I consider) to be a branch of Dark Academia. The two are ideologically similar but are distinctly different in their aesthetic focus.
Chaotic Academia, at its core, celebrates the academic who maintains a prolonged passion for the pursuit and fair distribution of knowledge. A Chaotic Academic needs no institutional affiliation but if they are, they go about their pursuit of knowledge with a clear awareness of the problems of modern academia and do their part in fighting these problems.

A Chaotic Academic forges their own path, achieving great things without sucking up to authority or conforming to the standards of modern academia that demand and celebrate the sacrifice of one’s mental/emotional/physical health for the sake of productivity. In their pursuit of knowledge, the Chaotic Academic is willing to break the arbitrary and bureaucratic rules that serve capitalist and/or classist interests (which is why you can also call it Punk Academia!). Perhaps considered too idealistic, a Chaotic Academic remains principled and ethical against institutions that demand compliance and passivity.

The Chaotic Academic embraces, well, the chaos of academia: illegible notes, disorganized desks, fields of study too niche to be easily applicable in the real world. They reject dogma; they instead, celebrate the ambiguous and amorphous nature of knowledge. The Chaotic Academic absolutely refuses to become jaded or cynical, maintaining a boundless, almost childlike, enthusiasm for their field of study and wonder at the world around them. This is often why Chaotic Academics make such great teachers!

A Chaotic Academic finds value in all facets of knowledge and constantly seeks to expand their mind, not to prove superiority, but simply for the joy of learning. Chaotic Academics are drawn to the oddities of the world, the niche, the inexplicable, the mysterious; they are troves of strange and fascinating bits of knowledge after one too many nights down the Wikipedia rabbit hole.

Here are things that capture the essence of the Chaotic Academia aesthetic:

  • Pirating textbook pdfs (and distributing said pdfs to your classmates)

  • Creating your own major

  • Questionable fashion choices

  • Sneaking into classes you haven’t registered for

  • Using memes to help you study

  • Turning in a paper a week late but 8 pages over the max requirement

  • Desk vandalism that helps you on a test

  • Using random items as bookmarks

  • Running around barefoot

  • A tattoo that peaks out from under the collar of your lab coat

  • Fighting for greater equality and inclusivity in post- secondary education

  • Collaboration across disciplines/fields of study

  • Partying the night before a big test and still acing it the next day

Chaotic Academia lacks a distinct visual aesthetic; it’s an aesthetic comprised of mindset, behavior, and lifestyle. And this is where I feel Chaotic Academia branches away from Dark Academia. It does not make Chaotic Academia better or more superior than Dark Academia. I simply prefer to align myself with Chaotic Academia for its visual versatility.

Wanna be pen pals? Shoot me an email at [email protected]

Send me that picture of a cool mushroom you found while you were out walking, share some of your favorite songs, or ramble on about what's been bugging you lately, present me with a list of every instance in which I've committed a slight against you, or just tell me about your day.

And if we end up hitting it off after exchanging a few emails, I'd be totally down to sending handwritten letters.